this, so much.
If I ever get married, our vows better be based on the Team Rocket motto.
I vow to protect you from devastation.
To unite our privates and feel sensation.
To pronounce you as my one true love,
and see the glitter of your eyes in the stars above.
Team Rocket, married, committed for life!
Pronounce us now, as husband and wife!
This is the best thing I’ve seen on Tumblr today.
i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed
i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police
Observe my very adult dinner: chicken nuggets and animal shaped potatoes.
You should have had dinosaur chicken nuggets. Then you could have a battle with ketchup and BBQ as blood, and you eat the chicken nuggets first because dinosaurs are extinct, and then the potato animals because lots of animals are endangered or extinct, and then you get sad for a moment because extinction is sad, and then you get happy because chicken nuggets and potato animals. Magical.
"pokemon is for little kids"
what the hell’s a laker
this is the teacher from the incredibles